everything in me is in a huge mess like really huge!!!

i found out about some news which i wished i didnt found out about...out of boredom i went to read it and it was really a hit to me...i do not know whether it is true but it seem really true to me...i tried so hard to forget and i did managed to reach to a point where i no longer need to suffer so much but this news i read was really a hit and i can never face it the same way again...I am not talking to anyone about this. I am not going to face it like a strong person. I cannot do it again the smile on my face would never be true unless i have truely forgotten this matter and the feelings...why must i be such an idiot to even LIKE him in the first place now i have to face these...

i tried erasing these painful memories and keep the nice, enjoyable memories but it is always haunting me...must i know it is life but it didnt start well or anything it was mainly a misunderstanding by ME...if i did not have said anything to anyone there would be a different matter

i'm hurt but no one cares, i need to talk to someone but no one is willing to listen, so why not keep it all inside and carry that smile to make people worry less...i should learn how to keep my mouth shut next time and also not spill everything out so easily to others...it would make people around me feel much better less akward...guess year 2 sem 1 would mean a really new me maybe an emo one or at least someone more matured all i can do now is heal up and hope for the best...

Love ; Ewen

with loads of ♥.9:25 PM